The Walking Dead Season 5 Predictions From Conan O'Brien

So if the zombie apocalypse ended tomorrow, what fate would befall the cast of The Walking Dead?

Conan O'Brien seems to know the answer. In his appearance on last Sunday's Talking Dead episode, the red-headed comedian predicted that within season five's next three episodes, the the zombies will "die off very quickly, and the threat will be over."

Without pesky nuisances like "survival" and zombie killing eating up the cast's free time, the last-night host predicted a completely revamped lifestyle for Rick Grimes and his band of survivors. Indeed, the future looks much rosier under O'Brien's vision, including:

-Rick going on Zoloft, and finally "leveling out."
-Carl attending school and getting a "proper education." Preferably, one without guns.
-Michonne taking a job at a deli counter slicing meats.
-Abraham, The Walking Dead's resident ginger, locating Conan, because they "were separated at birth."
-Eugene winning a fortune on Jeopardy!, because "not many guys that smart have a mullet."

And, of course, everyone would all rent out the same apartment and "drive each other crazy" with hilarious sitcom hijinks. It's certainly a more...pedestrian lifestyle compared to what the cast has endured over the years, but a less miserable one by most standards.

Someone get Robert Kirkman started the screen treatment, stat.

You can watch the video below for O'Brien's full vision.

The Walking Dead's fifth season continues this Sunday on AMC.