Fortnite Store Update Adds Spandex Squad Gear

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(Photo: Epic Games)

Mullets and big hair are back baby! Today at 8 p.m. EST, like every day at 8 p.m., Epic Games updated the Fortnite Store, and this time said update includes some brand-new items.

In addition to a variety of old items, the store update adds the "Spandex Squad Gear," which includes two new outfits, a new glider, and a new harvesting tool.

The highlight of the store update is undoubtedly the two new outfits, which embrace the three best things about the 80s: big hair, mullets, and colorful aerobics clothing.

Both the Aerobic Assassin and Mullet Marauder are "epic" level skins (purple), meaning they cost 1,500 V-Bucks, which is a steal. After all, you can't put a price on nice hair. You know how much hairspray product you need to get hair that big? A ton. And you know how much dedication and good genes you need to grow a mullet like that? An ungodly amount. Reality is cruel, so you likely have none of these things. But what you do have is the option to spend 1,500 V-Bucks and live vicariously through your Fortnite character.

In order to complete the set you will need to fork over another 1,000 V-Bucks, 500 for the "Windbreaker" glider and 500 for the "Axercise" harvesting tool. So, if you're keeping count on your big calculator, that's 4,000 V-Bucks in order to completely transition into an 80's stereotype. That's, like, roughly $50, which by my personal calculations is....completely worth it.

Fortnite is available for PlayStation 4, Xbox One, PC, Nintendo Switch, and mobile devices. For more news, information, and media on the game, click here.

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DISCLAIMER: Fortnite isn't real life, it's just a game. In other words, having a mullet won't make you any better at the game as it has no actual impact on gameplay. The opposite of its real-life powers.

DISCLAIMER TWO: There is no monetary incentive for me if you buy these items. This isn't a sponsored post. There isn't any kickbacks. Epic Games doesn't know I exist. I'm just trying to help you make great life decisions.