Every Major ’80s 3D Horror Film Ranked by How Much Stuff Flies at the Screen

In the early 1980s, if you were a studio with a horror franchise on your hands and it had just had two financially successful installments, part of you was dead set on making the third film a 3-D extravaganza. Three such threequels came out, and when it comes to utilization of the then moderately impressive technology, they used it to varying degrees of impressiveness. They weren’t alone in trying to stand out (or pop out) to viewers via the tech either because, just like in the ’50s, there were quite a few horror or sci-fi horror movies that jumped on the brief 3-D rebirth bandwagon.

What follows, though, are just the biggest four of that brief ’80s 3-D boom, ranked according to how many objects or monsters come right out at the viewer. If you happen to have a 3-D TV and a Blu-ray copy of the movies, it’s a combination that makes these otherwise (mostly) lackluster movies, well, more enjoyable, just not in a way you would confuse with high art.

4) Parasite

Whether you’re just ranking the major ’80s 3-D horror movies based on their general merits or how much stuff pokes out at the audience, Parasite comes in dead last. Horror is supposed to be exciting, and this post-apocalyptic pseudo-chiller is nothing more than dull.

There’s the occasional pipe sticking through a guy towards the viewer, but that’s about it. Demi Moore once called Parasite the worst movie she has ever starred in. She wasn’t wrong. It can’t even deliver on 3-D cheese.

3) Amityville 3-D

We’re still at the point where ranking the ’80s 3-D horror movies lines up when it comes to overall quality and amount of things coming right at the viewer. In the case of Amityville 3-D, it’s a watered down version of the first film (the first two installments were rated R, the third is PG) with barely any scares and some uneven pacing.

As far as what comes poking out towards the viewer, it comes down to three categories. Flies, the back of a truck, and a demon from the bowels of Hell. Flies are the object most frequently used (in other words, extremely often) and they don’t really come out towards the viewer in a beeline as much as they just kind of hover towards the forefront of the frame.

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2) Friday the 13th Part III

The top two entries here have basically the same number of “Coming right at ya!” moments, but the one that isn’t Friday the 13th Part III gets the edge for just how ill-fitting they feel and elongated they are. This is also where we leave the lining up between overall quality and the aforementioned “right at ya!” factor because Friday the 13th Part III is easily the best of the four, and even still most wouldn’t call it high art.

But if anything can be said of Friday the 13th Part III it’s that it is the most atmospheric of the bunch, the franchise was ready-made for 3-D (it all revolves around sharp objects being used on folks), and it’s hugely important to the IP. This is, of course, the installment where Jason got his hockey mask. As for very 3-D moments, there’s silly stuff like a yo-yo being dropped to the camera but there is also a pitchfork going through a man, the back of that same pitchfork poking towards the viewer while its points are pinning a woman to a barn’s wall, and a man getting his head squished so hard his eyeball leaves his skull and heads towards the audience.

1) Jaws 3-D

Jaws 2 may have been a surprisingly excellent sequel, but Jaws 3-D is just a wash. It could have been great, too. A great white infiltrating SeaWorld? Not a bad concept.

But the execution left a lot to be desired, with the film languishing for long stretches that are ultimately punctuated with uninvolving shark sequences. As for 3-D utilization, though, it does check the cheesy boxes it should. There’s something about being underwater that is very conducive to 3-D (see Piranha 3-D for proof in a better movie), but this movie also has a tendency to make the things that float towards the forefront of the screen basically drift towards the audience for a long period. Half a fish? Check. A chewed off arm? Check? The shark itself? Check. The latter looks especially terrible, but it’s just about as good an indicator of where 3-D tech was at the time as any.