Read J. Jonah Jameson’s Daily Bugle Editorial Exposing Spider-Man’s Secret Identity

The secret is out: Peter Parker is Spider-Man. His identity revealed to the world by Mysterio (Jake Gyllenhaal) and TheDailyBugle.net editor J. Jonah Jameson (J.K. Simmons) in Spider-Man: Far From Home, the unmasked Peter Parker (Tom Holland) is Public Enemy #1 in Spider-Man: No Way Home. Framed for Mysterio’s murder and branded a Spider-Menace by the blustering Bugle newsman, Peter’s identity crisis is the top story as Jameson wages a war of words against Spider-Man on social media and national television. Below, read the headline story “Spider-Maniac’s Web of Destruction,” Jameson’s scathing and libelous editorial printed in a special newsstand edition of The Daily Bugle. 

Maniac. Menace. Mystery? No more! That’s right, true Buglers! Ever since the masked marauder masquerading as Spider-Man dangled with impunity above our city streets – without a permit, might I add – and took the law into his own web-covered hands, yours truly worked tirelessly to de-mask the myth and reveal the truth. And now we have. Peter Parker. Just a boy.

And now that the coward has been unmasked, will he do his civic duty and answer for his egregious crimes? Will he use his great power to join the police force? The fire department? Fat chance! Will Peter Parker take responsibility for the vandalism and destruction of property those powers have left smoking in his wake? Ha! Don’t make me laugh!

Parker wore a mask because he refuses to answer for his actions. He kept his identity hidden because he views himself as above the law. But if the Constitution doesn’t allow citizens to vote until they’ve reached the age of 18, why would we continue to let a child decide who is saved and who is guilty?

We know he’s made mistakes before. Just ask Quentin Beck. Oh, wait, you can’t! ‘Cause Spidey killed him! So if you don’t want to be next, dear reader, join me in this call to the unmasked red-tight-wearing monster:

Peter Parker, we are the public, and we will be YOUR judge and YOUR jury. Call the tip line, folks. Let Parker know you’re watching.

J. Jonah Jameson, Editor in Chief  

Daily Bugle readers are encouraged to report their Spidey tips to 609-SPDY-TIP. Jameson’s tireless crusade against the unmasked menace continues on the official Daily Bugle TikTok account, featuring reporter Betty Brant (Angourie Rice). 

Promotional hard copy editions of Jameson’s Daily Bugle exposé were available for a limited time at a pop-up newsstand in New York City. 

Starring Tom Holland, Zendaya, Marisa Tomei, Jacob Batalon, Willem Dafoe, Alfred Molina, Jamie Foxx, and Benedict Cumberbatch as Doctor Strange, Spider-Man: No Way Home is playing exclusively in theaters on December 17.