Delivered by FeedBurner
So the mainstream media is in shock over Superman announcing plans to renounce his U.S. citizenship. However, Comicbook.com did some research, and this latest move by the Man of Steel shouldn’t really come as a complete surprise. It turns out that there were several warning signs, and this is far from the first time that Superman has engaged in un-American activity.
Like, for example, there was the time that Superman punched the Statue of Liberty right in the kisser. With a sharp left hook, Superman knocked Lady Liberty’s head clean off. Later, Superman claimed that he had a couple glasses of wine with dinner and had mistaken Lady Liberty for a giant robot, but we don’t know if we buy that explanation anymore.
Then, there was the time that Superman blew up the Washington Monument and turned his back and flew away. What was the Man of Steel’s explanation? He said he just wanted to look cool like all those heroes in the movies that turn their backs and walk away from explosions. But really did he have to choose the Washington Monument for his photo-op?
Next, there was the time that Superman made a mockery of the game of baseball, which is America’s favorite pastime. Superman spent several hours breaking bats and terrorizing pitchers, before he renounced the game of baseball forever. At the time, people thought it was a good thing that Superman gave up on baseball, but now we have to wonder if it was all part of a bigger plan.
Let’s not forget the Summer that Superman spent vacationing in Russia. Now, everyone needs some time off every once and awhile to enjoy life, but what was the deal with the whole hammer and sickle thing he did with his costume?
America’s always been about freedom of religion, but not so much when Superman’s concerned. Was he letting his true thoughts be known when he hurled a cross into outer space?
Now, this can’t directly be tied as an attack against America, but we’re sure no one’s forgotten the time that Superman punched Santa Claus right in the stomach. We mean, what kind of person does something like that anyway?
One of the most disturbing incidents we uncovered was when Superman gathered up all the U.S. money in the world and burned it up with his heat vision. One could argue that money is the root of all evil, but did Superman really have to do it in front of a poor, crippled American soldier?
Still not convinced? Well, what about the time that Superman actually typed up a written confession. Yes, it’s all there in black and white, Superman admitted that he spied against his country, and he even went as far as to claim that terror was his secret weapon.
Now, for those that think the American way simply isn’t enough anymore, and that Superman has the best intentions in becoming a citizen of the world, then you might want to take a gander at how exactly Superman’s meeting with the United Nations went down. Seems that renouncing his U.S. citizenship wasn’t the only thing that Superman had on his mind. Guess America and the rest of the world can look forward to being unified under one flag?
All heil the new Superman, citizen (and absolute dictator) of the world!
Related posts:
