With the film opening in theaters tomorrow night, the official review embargo for Universal’s Robert Downey Jr. starring Dolittle has been lifed. Coupled with that comes the film’s Rotten Tomatoes score, which as of this writing is sitting at a dreadful 14%. Even when compared to other 2020 new releases that have received terrible reviews like The Grudge (17% on RT) and Like A Boss (18% on RT), Dolittle is the worst reviewed movie of the new year so far; though it remains to be seen how long it will keep that title. That in mind, we’ve collected some of the best and funniest jabs at the movie that are currently published on Rotten Tomatoes. Read them for yourself below!
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Warning: Some light spoilers for Dolittle ahead, should you be curious to not know them…
The official synopsis for the film, which naturally leaves out the movie’s butt-themed Dragon sequence, reads:
“After losing his wife seven years earlier, the eccentric Dr. John Dolittle (Downey), famed doctor and veterinarian of Queen Victoria’s England, hermits himself away behind the high walls of Dolittle Manor with only his menagerie of exotic animals for company. But when the young queen (Jessie Buckley, Wild Rose) falls gravely ill, a reluctant Dolittle is forced to set sail on an epic adventure to a mythical island in search of a cure, regaining his wit and courage as he crosses old adversaries and discovers wondrous creatures.
The doctor is joined on his quest by a young, self-appointed apprentice and a raucous coterie of animal friends, including an anxious gorilla (Oscar winner Rami Malek), an enthusiastic but bird-brained duck (Oscar winner Octavia Spencer), a bickering duo of a cynical ostrich (The Big Sick’s Kumail Nanjiani) and an upbeat polar bear (John Cena, Bumblebee), and a headstrong parrot (Oscar winner Emma Thompson), who serves as Dolittle’s most trusted advisor and confidante.”
ComicBook.com says…
“Dolittle is a messy and lazy comedy that doesn’t have much to say. It’s the kind of movie that kids growing up today will look back on with fondness; they’ll know it’s not very good, but they’ll laugh nostalgically and enjoy it all the same.” – Charlie Ridgely, ComicBook.com
A surprise in its badness
“I wasn’t expecting Dolittle to be good, exactly, but I wasn’t expecting it to be quite this bad.” – Bilge Ebiri, New York Magazine/Vulture
Sorry Richard
“Please make it stop.” Richard Roeper, Chicago Sun-Times
I’m sorry, he does what?
There’s got to be a moment, as an actor watches himself on-screen pulling bagpipes out of a CGI dragon’s rear end, that he thinks, “Have I really fallen this far?” – Sara Stewart, New York Post
Less appeal than cats????
“Dolittle is tonally at war with itself, chopped to bits by editing, and discombobulated in ways that are reminiscent of but lack the cult appeal of 2019’s Cats.” – Matt Donato, Atom Insider
Unwatchable
“A series of increasingly bizarre acting choices and cringe-worthy anachronisms turn Dolittle into an unwatchable circus.” – Hoai-Tran Bui, Slashfilm
No puns allowed
“I literally don’t care enough to think up a good pun.” Robert Daniels, 812filmreviews
Doc says what?
“Maybe the animals could understand what Dolittle was saying, but I couldn’t.” – Hannah Lodge, The Beat
Makes perfect sense!
“The story is unnecessarily complicated for a movie that significantly less than two hours…Why is the squirrel that is clearly from England and shot by an English boy, American?” Jenna Busch, VitalThrills.com
They should have called this one The Disaster Artist, but it was taken
“The pedigree of the ‘Dolittle’ cast and crew is genuinely stunning. It’s unfathomable this has all fallen apart so disastrously.” – Doug Jamieson, The Jam Report
Once again, he does what?
“I definitely don’t recall a scene in which the good doctor has to perform a rectal probe on said dragon, with much comic passing of gas. If that strikes you as hilarious, by all means go with God.” Ty Burr, Boston Globe