This 1960s Christmas Movie Is Considered One of the Worst Films of All-Time

Plan 9 from Outer Space, Mommie Dearest, Troll 2, Batman & Robin, and Battlefield Earth. What do all of these films have in common? They’re considered contenders for the title of “Worst movie of all time.” What else do they have in common? They’re all pretty entertaining if viewed with a sense of irony, with a drink in hand, or a combination of the two. Add 1964’s Santa Claus Conquers the Martians to that list, because it fully applies. With a title like that, how could it not? It’s the exact type of movie that is featured on Mystery Science Theater 3000 (and it has been).

What On Earth is Santa Claus Conquers the Martians About?

The narrative, as it were, follows Santa Claus as he’s kidnapped under the orders of a Martian ruler. This ruler, Kimar, feels the children of his planet are too enamored with Earth’s pop culture, and it’s made them grow lazy. The point of bringing Santa Claus into the mix? To make them less complacent (somehow).

Once on Mars, Santa still can’t catch a break. He and two Earth children who were kidnapped alongside him start a factory to bring joy to the Martian children, but soon find it sabotaged by a nefarious trio named Voldar, Stobo, and Shim. But that trio is in the minority, as most of the Martian populace takes a liking to Claus and the Earth kiddos. When all is said and done, one of them has taken the holly jolly gig on the foreign planet, and Earth’s Santa gets to go back home and continue doing his thing.

[Related: 10 Christmas Movies You Forgot Featured Marvel and DC Stars]

What Makes It Such a Mess?

The film’s production values are, to put it lightly, atrocious. Even at the time, it must have been jarring to look at. On the upside, Santa Claus Conquers the Martians doesn’t even run an hour and 10 minutes (depending which version you watch), so those who need their movies to look pretty don’t have to suffer for long.

It’s campy throughout but simultaneously takes itself a little too seriously. And, with the aforementioned plot, not one frame can be taken seriously. To its credit, though, that goofball story has a certain level of charm, to the point it becomes engrossing if the viewer sticks with it. Not to mention, the quality of the performances can be a hoot.

Is Santa Claus Conquers the Martians Truly the Worst Christmas Movie of All Time?

Film quality is subjective, but sugarcoating is for Santa’s bakery. Yes, Santa Claus Conquers the Martians is almost certainly the worst Christmas movie out there. It’s not a movie that’s outright trying to be so-bad-it’s-good, like Birdemic: Shock and Terror or Sharknado, which means it missed every mark it was trying to hit. It just got lucky in having a certain silly quality that’s grown on audiences capable of appreciating it.

All that said, there are some Christmas flicks out there that had a lot more money behind them and are basically just as much a lump of coal. For instance, Home Alone 3 tried to continue the franchise without Macaulay Culkin and it’s a borderline unbearable watch. The chances of the viewer finishing it as opposed to stopping halfway through and putting on the original (or Home Alone 2: Lost in New York) instead are slim.

As for other festive follow-ups, The Santa Clause really should have stopped after the first installment. The second one is watchable, but mostly lacks the charm found in that ’90s classic. And once the viewer gets to The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause (which features a Martin Short performance that’s too much even for his fans), they’re outright wasting their time.

Seth Gordon’s Four Christmases, starring Vince Vaughn, Reese Witherspoon, and Jon Favreau, is a star-studded, unpleasant mess. And, while on the topic of Vaughn, Fred Claus is a movie that doesn’t even seem to know which demo it’s catering to. But the true threat to Santa Claus Conquers the Martians‘ title is Surviving Christmas, a movie featuring such an obnoxious performance from Ben Affleck that the only thing the viewer feels is sympathy for his co-stars, including the late James Gandolfini.

Like Night of the Living Dead, Santa Claus Conquers the Martians is in the public domain, so it’s very easily accessible (you can even watch it on its Wikipedia page). The comparisons between those two particular films end there, but that’s not to say the latter isn’t worth checking out, just don’t expect high art. For those who like some cheese around the holidays, however…