10 Lamest Spider-Man Villains Ranked by How Embarrassing They Were

Spider-Man has one of the most robust and colorful rogues’ galleries in comic books. Villains like the psychotic Green Goblin and the genius Doctor Octopus provide near-constant life-threatening challenges for the Web-Head to overcome. Still, with so many villains over the years, there are bound to be a few blunders. And there are. Spider-Man has plenty of laughable and embarrassing enemies whose gimmicks and costumes make them look ridiculous. Many of them are also incredibly weak, as Spider-Man can defeat them without breaking a sweat. Most of these goofy villains are complete jokes to both the heroes and villains of Marvel.

Here are the 10 lamest supervillains that the Amazing Spider-Man has ever faced over his long superhero career.

10) Spidercide

“The Clone Saga” is one of the most infamous Spider-Man storylines because of its constant retconning and the appearance of new clones claiming to be Peter Parker. By the time the villainous Spidercide showed up, believing himself to be the original Peter, fans had had enough. Although Spidercide possesses an incredible number of powers, including super-strength and shapeshifting, there’s nothing about his character that’s original or interesting. Everything about his background, personality, and abilities had been explored in greater detail by characters like Scarlet Spider, Kaine, and Carnage. Spidercide feels like a cheap and bland imitator who only existed to drag out “The Clone Saga” beyond its natural expiration.

9) Gibbon

Martin Blank, aka Gibbon, was a mutant who was born with a monkey-like appearance. He had never been treated seriously. Martin dressed himself up in a monkey suit and tried to team up with Spider-Man. But his ridiculous get-up caused Spider-Man to burst out laughing. This rejection made Martin swear revenge against the Wall-Crawler. Despite possessing superhuman strength and agility, Martin never became a noteworthy adversary and was frequently defeated by Spider-Man with minimal effort. He even joined the Legion of Losers, a team consisting of other lame Spider-Man villains, like the Kangaroo. Martin was eventually killed by Kraven the Hunter’s Hunterbots.

8) White Rabbit

Lorina Dodson left her wealthy upbringing to become a supervillain inspired by the White Rabbit character from Alice in Wonderland. Using an assortment of exploding stopwatches and explosive carrot-firing umbrellas, Lorina has tried her best to become a serious threat, but she always falls short. In her first appearance, she was easily apprehended while robbing a fast-food restaurant by Spider-Man and the D-List hero Frog Man. One of her most ridiculous weapons is a giant mechanical bunny rabbit armed with machine guns, which she rides into battle. With a gimmick and weapons as silly as these, it’s no wonder that, despite Lorina’s best efforts, no one takes her seriously.

7) Slyde

Spider-Man uses his sticky webbing to apprehend criminals. To overcome this weapon, Jalome Beacher, aka Slyde, found a way to make sure that the Wall-Crawler could never grab him. Jalome’s suit gives him the power of incredible slipperiness, and that’s it. Jalome created a special lubricant that makes him practically frictionless, allowing him to slide on any surface. To fund his chemical research, he robbed banks using his suit. His suit is so slippery that he can slide along at speeds of 30 mph, although that’s not nearly fast enough to evade the likes of the web-slinging Spider-Man. Aside from his slipperiness, Jalome has no other powers. This means that a single punch from the Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man was enough to knock the escape artist out cold.

6) Kangaroo

Remarkably, not one but two criminals thought that “Kangaroo” was a good supervillain name. The first Kangaroo was an Australian former kickboxer named Frank Oliver. Paul lived and ate alongside wild kangaroos, learning how to jump freakish heights, which he later used to become a criminal. After Frank died, another Kangaroo hopped up to take on the mantle: Brian Hibbs. Brian wears a suit of armor designed to look like a kangaroo, complete with a tail, big ears, and a pouch. Unlike most kangaroos, he tucks a cannon inside his pouch. Hilariously, when Brian tried to use his pouch-cannon on Spider-Man, the Wall-Crawler webbed it up, and it literally blew up in the villain’s face.

5) Hypno-Hustler

Marvel has plenty of timeless villains who have remained relevant for decades. Antoine Delsoin, aka Hypno-Hustler, is not one of those villains. Antoine is portrayed as an evil disco musician. He uses hypnotic goggles, a hypnotic guitar, and anesthetic-spraying boots to brainwash his audience so that he can rob them blind. To help with his funky crime spree, Antoine has a team of backup singers called the Mercy Killers. Everything about this villain is silly, from his incredibly dated gimmick to his goofy disco-based weapons. He’s basically what would happen if Disco Stu from The Simpsons turned to a life of crime (and failed miserably). Unsurprisingly, he’s been relegated in more recent years to just being a one-note joke villain.

4) Big Wheel

To pursue a life of crime, Jackson Weele drives one of the most outlandish vehicles in comic books. Jackson commissioned the mad engineer known as the Tinkerer to build him a vehicle capable of contending with heroes like Spider-Man and Rocket Racer. The result was a giant wheel armed with missiles, lasers, and mechanical arms. It’s an incredibly impractical vehicle because it lacks maneuverability and can be tipped over very easily. Additionally, Jackson isn’t even that good of a driver. In his first supervillain outing, he accidentally drove himself straight into the Hudson River. Although Jackson survived the embarrassing incident and reappeared multiple times afterwards, he has always been a laughingstock of New York’s criminal underworld.

3) Typeface

Gordon Thomas, aka Typeface, has one of the dumbest costumes and gimmicks in Marvel Comics. Gordon was a veteran who, after getting fired from a sign-making company, went crazy and became a supervillain. As his moniker implies, Gordon drew letters all over his face and uses letter-shaped gadgets and weapons. After several encounters with the alphabet-themed villain, Spider-Man convinced Gordon to try being a hero instead. Gordon agreed, and for a while even had a grammar-obsessed sidekick called Spellcheck. However, Gordon’s time as a hero was short-lived because Venom killed him during Civil War. It’s very easy to see why Marvel quickly erased this joke of a character.

2) Walrus

Hubert Carpenter was an overweight janitor who obtained the powers of a Walrus after being used as a lab rat for his uncle’s experiments. Taking on the name Walrus, Hubert started as a villain of the superhero team the Defenders, before moving on to become an incompetent foe of Spider-Man. Like a real walrus trying to navigate on land, Hubert is a bumbling and clumsy buffoon who can’t compete with Spider-Man’s agility. And although Hubert is super strong, a single flick to the noggin is enough to knock him out cold. Add in a costume that looks like it came from Chuck E. Cheese, and you’ve got a recipe for a villain who makes people laugh every time he shows up.

1) Wall

Joshua Waldemeyer, aka The Wall, is a villain so inept that he never made an official debut in the Earth-616 main continuity. Instead, he appears in the Spidey Super Stories on Earth-57780. A lab accident bonded Joshua to a brick wall, turning him into a lumbering mass of brick and cement. He went on a rampage during a baseball game when Spider-Man intervened. Although the Wall’s body is incredibly durable, his main problem is that he doesn’t have arms, making him a pretty unintimidating villain. His only way of fighting is bumping into people awkwardly. The Wall only made one appearance, but his design and silly gimmick make him one of the most infamous villains among bad Spider-Man characters of all time.

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