Let's kick off Marvel's angsty teen show about mean parents and the kids who are annoyed by them with a funeral.
Members of the PRIDE and other random people are carrying two coffins, and the kids look much younger. We also see Amy is with them, and Molly has a broken leg, and sits in a wheelchair. Stacey Yorkes kisses young Molly, leading to the realization that we're watching her parents' funeral.
At the wake, Janet Stein and Catherine Wilder share a glass of Glenlivet 12 (good choice) and toast to the memories of Gene and Alice Hernandez, who perished in a fire. Across the room, Geoffrey Wilder corners Robert Minoru and comments on Tina's burns, all but accusing them of starting the fire. With this, we see that the cracks in the PRIDE have long been there.
Stacey and Dale Yorkes meet in the kitchen, where Dale is worried the other members will find out they spoke with the Hernandez parents on the night of their deaths and would get suspicious. They speak with young Molly, who doesn't quite realize what happened to her parents. The Yorkes want to give her a good life and ask if she wants to live with them. Molly is wearing the same cat hair clip that she lost in the Wilder's office.
Cut to the present day, and Molly is freaking out about her missing clip. Her strength kicks in as she's searching her drawers, tossing one across the room. Gert enters the room and tells her to look for it later, but Molly reiterates its importance by revealing her mother gave it to her before she died.
Molly attempts to confide in Gert about her weird abilities, but Gert hijacks the conversation and assumes she's just having panic attacks.
Karolina meditates to her mother's self-help audio book, and SPEAK OF THE CULT LEADER, Leslie Dean pops into the room. She tries to have a conversation, but Karolina is distracted by a social media post from her classmates. The boys that Chase beat up for attempting to rape Karolina are planning to get their revenge and are turning their class against him.
But Karolina gets another message, this time from Destiny.
At the beach meeting Alex organized, Karolina reveals the message to the rest of the group. It includes a selfie of Destiny in front of Big Ben, saying that a spot opened on the Church of Gibborim's trip to London and she got to go. The kids are confused, considering they thought they watched their parents murder her.
The Price of Genius
Nico claims the picture is doctored, Chase confuses LARPing with furries, and Alex recommends they investigate their parents. Karolina is going to check out the church, Chase and Gert are going to look for the pod in Victor's lab, Alex is going to scope out the secret basement, and Nico wants to find out what is up with her mom's staff.
Molly mentions the "monster" in her basement, and despite all of the other weird shit going on no one seems to believe her. She gets upset and goes off on her own, while Karolina tells Chase about the posts his lacrosse teammates wrote, and asks if something happened the night at the party, but Chase tells her there's nothing to worry about.
In Victor's lab, Destiny is covered in grime and pleading for mercy, asking for freedom in exchange for her silence. But when Stein turns to look at her, she's gone. He doesn't notice his wife Janet enter the lab, asking if he's been working through the night. Victor looks a bit mad and slightly exhausted, so when Janet hints that maybe the pod wasn't the problem at the PRIDE meeting, but Victor was, he gets angry. But they're late for a charity auction, so he cuts the argument short.
We jump to the Yorkes' lab at Synnergy Bioengineering, where Stacey comments on how she's relieved she never has to see Tina Minoru after last night's meeting. So picture her face when they enter a surprise party thrown by none other than the Minorus. They truly are despicable; NO ONE likes surprise parties.
The Yorkes are confused about the reason for the party, but Robert Minoru reveals their Synnergy serum has made it to the cover of the American Journal of Experimental Medicine. The Minorus invested in the company, and after the company sells they're expecting a hefty paycheck. They comment on what the serum does, with Dale Yorkes wanting to sell it to DARPA in order to help soldiers forget traumatic moments and aid PTSD treatments.
Tina starts lightening up, reminding Robert of their dates to a crappy sushi restaurant nearby. She wants to go on a date with her husband, but Robert is evasive. Tina wants to try to repair their relationship, but Robert deflects and wants to invite Nico along, saying she needs her parents right now.prevnext
Molly Gets Caught
In the Stein lab, Gert and Chase get their sleuthing on. Gert finds the X-ray goggles Victor invented -- which become a part of Chase's repertoire in the comics -- and uses them to look at Chase's, ahem, package.
Gert discovers a secret door behind some roll-away storage containers, leading to the pod. She examines the pod with the goggles, and Destiny isn't inside. But Gert is still uneasy, and based on Molly's comments she wants to investigate her own basement to see if the Yorkes are keeping Destiny there.
Catherine and Geoffrey Wilder discuss Molly's hairpin. Catherine is determined to find out if she was there, and she has just the tool to help her figure it out: a vial of the Synnergy serum. Geoffrey objects, saying, "You saw what it did to Frank Dean. He's never been the same. You wanna mess with a young girl's mind?" But Catherine is determined and won't let a child ruin all of their hard work. But hey! Now we know why Kip Pardue is so clueless in this show!
The Minorus are getting ready for their date. Nico encourages them to go alone, opting to stay behind and secretly investigate the Staff of One. Only she can't figure out how to open the special case her mom has it locked inside of.
Catherine Wilder tracks down Molly at a nearby coffee shop, pretending that it was a coincidence. She shows Molly the hair clip and asks her why it was in the study and not the rec room, where the kids were. Molly says it's because of her going through puberty, she was trying to find a bathroom, and when Catherine attempts to confide in her, Molly darts for the bathroom and cuts the conversation short.
Catherine, suspicious, tries to follow Molly. So the youngster uses her super strength to rip out the toilet and toss it through the window for an escape. She gets to the back of the coffee shop, but her resulting exhaustion kicks in and she passes out next to the dumpster.
Alex attempts to investigate his dad's study and opens the secret passage way. When he calls his dad to make sure he's not home, he's shocked to learn that Geoffrey is actually in the kitchen. Panicking and frantic, Alex tries to shut the secret doorway, hanging up on his dad and arousing suspicion.prevnext
No Panties on the Table
Catherine finds Molly in the alleyway. She loads her in her SUV and takes her to a remote area. Molly wakes up, and Catherine is ready to inject her with the serum. Catherine asks if she's hiding anything, and Molly decides to confess: she went into the study because the other kids asked her to spy on the parents so they could raid the liquor cabinet.
The admission takes Catherine off guard, and she drops the serum to her side and instead tries to console Molly, who plays up the lie with a little bit of truth. No one believes Molly's "outrageous" claims, saying she's "just the adopted girl who everyone got stuck with." Catherine feels bad for Molly and tells her she'll tell her more about her parents now that she's old enough to know. But Molly is relieved that Catherine believed her.
While investigating her mom's room, Nico discovers that she took her dead sister Amy's diary and hid it in her desk drawer. She happens to activate a secret switch in the drawer that releases the Staff of One from its case. With the staff in hand, she accidentally pricks her hand, causing it to extend and light up. This calls back to the comic book, in which Nico has to harm herself by drawing blood in order to enact a spell with the staff, but in the series, she only has to prick her thumb.
Nico retrieves her sister's diary and finds a paper cut-out of a snowflake. It makes her smile, bringing her to tears, and causes snow to fall in her mom's office. At first she's surprised, happy to see something so amazing, but then she realizes what she's done. How is she going to stop it, clean it up, and hide it from her parents?
At the sushi place, the Minorus' date seems to be going well. Tina takes off her underwear and puts them in Robert's hand on the table, telling him that she booked a hotel room nearby and wants to have a tryst. Robert looks disgusted, and Tina replies that "it worked for Dakota Johnson."
Either Robert hates the Fifty Shades of Grey series or he has a stick up his ass. He rebukes his wife, saying they aren't characters in a trashy movie. Tina has been cold for years, and all of the sudden she's moving super fast in attempting to fix their relationship. He puts Tina's underwear on the table, which is very unsanitary considering they're in the middle of dinner.
Tina remarks that Robert used to love going to hotels and that she simply wants to have fun and spice up their marriage. The server comes by to check in on them and gets weirded out when she notices the panties. Maybe she has the same pair? She walks away without saying anything else. Robert is pissed and leaves the restaurant, not wanting to deal with Tina's confusing signals.prevnext
At the Church of Gibborim, Karolina is trying to find out what happened to Destiny when she runs into her mother's assistant. He tells her that he saw Destiny get in a car with the group heading to London, but Karolina can't get a hold of her now because Destiny's phone was disconnected.
Karolina asks the assistant if he ever takes off his Gibborim bracelet, and when he says yes, she asks if he saw the lights too. He, of course, has no idea what she's talking about. Karolina wonders if she's going crazy until she sees a painting her grandfather made that depicts an angel with the same vibrant colors she saw when she removed her bracelet.
Alex goes to help Nico get rid of the snow in her mom's office. She tells him she believes the Staff of One is magic, but Alex tries to find a logical explanation. When Alex touches the staff, it burns in his grip and he drops it, which thankfully stops the snowfall.
The Yorkes celebrate their scientific achievement with some Mexican food, also ordering 30 carnitas tacos for the dinosaur in the basement. They debate informing their daughters that they're planning to move to a remote location after the sale in order to get away from PRIDE.
Elsewhere, Robert Minoru meets up with Janet Stein in a hotel room, revealing the two are having an affair. I guess Robert still does like those hotel visits!
Nico and Alex clean up all of the snow, miraculously, but her mom has arrived home after her failed date. In order to cover their tracks, they go to her bedroom and pretend to be in the middle of their own tryst. Tina walks in on the teens as Nico sits on top of Alex and her mother's none too pleased. Tina kicks Alex out of the house, but Alex doesn't leave without getting a kiss from Nico.prevnext
Arsenic and Old Lace
Back at the sex hotel, Robert tells Janet that he wants to leave his wife and live his life with her. Janet comes up with excuses, like PRIDE, but Robert says that PRIDE won't matter once they "break ground," possibly referring to the school they're going to open. Janet, though, needs time to think about his offer. Between the affair, the panties on the table, and Gertrude looking at Chase's junk, this is starting to shape up into a trademark Savage and Schwartz TV show.
In the Yorkes basement, Gert and Chase discover a heavily fortified door. When they open it, a dinosaur runs out and knocks them over. It's Old Lace in all of her glory! She roars at the two teens, but when Gert panics and tells herself that she's under control of her anxiety attack, the dinosaur calms down. Old Lace then runs out of the house, leaving Chase and Gert to wonder what the hell just happened.
Back at the church, Leslie Dean meets with the crusty-skinned person on life support. She asks if they felt anything at all, and in a Darth Vader-esque voice they respond "nothing."0comments
Leslie then gets a call from Tina Minoru, who tells her to turn on the local news. When she turns on the TV, the news report says a body of a local girl washed up on the shore of the beach. She has been identified as Destiny Gonzalez. Tina remarks that Victor, Janet, and her husband aren't picking up their phones, hinting that she is aware of the affair. But Leslie is saddened by what it all means.
"We're gonna need another sacrifice," she says.prev