'Call of Duty: Black Ops 4' Has Some Hilarious Narrator Voice Lines

While Call of Duty: Black Ops 4 is all business when it comes to its multiplayer, Zombies and Blackout modes, it's not afraid to have a little fun. But to discover this, you'll have to jump into the game's tutorial mode, where series veteran Frank Woods is more than happy to walk you through your paces.

Per this article from Kotaku, a new video features Woods providing some rather hilarious quips over the course of your training. You can see them for yourself in the video above, but here's a recap of some of his best dialogue, which provides proof that he's not afraid to crack wise.

First, when you initially meet him, he says, "My name is Woods. If you don't know who I am, tough sh*t. You will."

We then get into in-game stuff, and Woods really begins to cut loose here. After you throw a grenade, he quips, "That dirtbag? He's now Mr. Stunned and Blind Dirtbag."

Then you go to another setting where you've just lobbed a grenade, and he follows up with, "Hey, sticks and stones may break your bones, but cluster grenades will f*ck you up dead."

We then go to a clip where your character is climbing out of water, and while you do so, Frank says, "Water in your boots, sand in your pants...no, you do not get to pee in the pool."

Then you get a neat little weapon in your hands, which Frank describes as, "The war machine has a yuge blast radius. YUUUUUUUGE."

We then go into more detail about the weapon and how you can bounce shots off walls. "Now bounce one off the wall, see how the other half lives...or dies. Mostly dies. That bounce is lit AF."

Then he gets all Shakespearean as you drop a grenade through an open wall. "What light through yonder window breaks...get your f*cking grenade, that's what it is. Nice job, Shakespeare -- you just f*cked up Lord Capulet's mansion!"

That's just the beginning of the video, as he goes into all sorts of references from "Hickory dickory dock" to calling you "Doctor Feelgood" (a Motley Crue fan?) and more. It's two minutes of hilarious exposition. There's even an Overwatch mention! (We think?)

Also, "fartjam" may be our new favorite name.

Call of Duty: Black Ops 4 is available now for Xbox One, PlayStation 4 and PC.

(Hat tip to Kotaku for the chuckles.)